Category Archives: messaging

Get Better Online Dating Results, In Less Time – eBook

So, I wrote a book.

After many many months struggling with online dating and coming up with solutions (as chronicled on this blog) I decided to succinctly collect everything I’ve learned, including all the time-saving tips, in a single, easy-to-read ebook.

In this book you will discover the secrets of how I:

  • Got a girl to send me her number in her very first message to me
  • Reduced the time I spent online dating from 2 hours to 20 minutes per week
  • Went on up to 4 dates per week with only 20 minutes’ per week investment

But this book isn’t just about online dating; it’s also about Craig’s list personals.

As a FREE bonus, I also decided to include the Craigslist M4W personals ad that has pulled the best for me over the years . . . this is a “Best-of-Craigslist” post that runs over 1,000 words and has 8 illustrations. Pretty much every time I run this ad, I get you 30+ real women responding with their pictures.

Running this ad will have you feeling like a hot chick. True, you’ll have to modify it for your city, but once you do, you’re golden.

How would you like to see the below in your inbox? 

Get dozens of women emailing you with this killer CL ad. (If not more.) It works.

Get dozens of women emailing you with this killer CL ad. It works.

Here’s a more complete rundown of what’s included in the book:

  • The 3 things that must be in your profile (page 18)
  • Why your writing skill doesn’t really matter to a girl (page 22)
  • Why the online dating websites want you to fail, and how to succeed despite them (pages 4 – 11)
  • Why it doesn’t matter what your first message says (page 13)
  • The 5 rules for creating profiles that stand out from the crowd (page 20)
  • Real-life examples of profiles that grab a woman’s attention and don’t let go (page 29)
  • The 9 photography techniques you need to apply to have the best possible photos (page 33)
  • The one messaging technique that improved my reply rate by 40% (page 37)
  • Real-life examples of messages that got the best replies from women (page 40)
  • Super-confident & aggressive messages that either get you in the door right away or crash-and-burn terribly (use with caution!) – page 43
  • How to interpret what she writes back (page 45)
  • How to get her phone number in four messages or less (page 47)
  • FREE BONUS: The only personals ad you’ll ever need — post this ad on Craigslist or your favorite online personals board and you will get women emailing you their photos within minutes — in some cases this ad has pulled over 100+ messages from women within 2 daysI includes the entire 1,135 word personal ad, word-for-word, and links to the 8 hand-drawn illustrations crafted to go along with it. (You MUST use this ad responsibly!)

So what are you waiting for?


Online Dating for the Modern Man + Bonus: The Only Personals Ad You’ll Ever Need. Now just $27 with instant PDF download

 Get your instant download


Every good product has a guarantee and mine is no exception.

I am so confident that you will get value out of this book — especially if you take the time to use the FREE bonus craig’s list personals ad — that I will refund your money 100%, for up to 90 days after your purchase date if you use the material therein and don’t get the results you want.

Basically, the book is the cost of a deli sandwich — and I’m offering to give you the cost back even after 3 months have past if you don’t like the taste of the sandwich.

I think you’ll agree that is a pretty solid guarantee.

So buy with confidence!


The Message Most Likely To Get a Response

Okay, so here’s a question that a lot of guys have on their minds when they first begin using online dating.

  • What do I say in a message to a girl?

You can say anything, but you want to make it good right?

Luckily, it turns out that most men send pretty incompetent — i.e., not great — messages. The vast majority seem to consist of “sup” or “hey you’re cute” or “wanna date me” or something else that seems to have taken almost zero effort.

It’s not very hard to write a better message than “sup bab-ee.” But in between that abysmal message and a really good, stand-out, 1% of attractive guys message is a vast, dream-littered field of mediocrity.

The goal of this article is to get you safely through that field of mediocrity and at least closer to a 1% message. Here’s what that message will look like.

Humor and Confidence

The message needs to convey your unique sense of humor, and your confidence in yourself.

You need to say things that communicate that you don’t take the whole thing too seriously. Don’t apologize or be contrite for messaging her. Don’t fawn over her. Don’t mention her looks. She knows you’re attracted to her on a physical level; that’s a given if you’re messaging her.

Humor and confidence. Confidence and humor.

Call to Action

My assumption here is that most women appreciate, on some level, a take-charge kinda guy. That’s the kinda guy you want to be (another assumption).

Don’t be afraid to end every message with a “call to action” — a directive that she email you. “Message me back” can work. So can “Anyway, email me,” and a thousand variations on the theme.

It’s amazing to me how many guys wonder why their online conversations stale out. When they share the back-and-forth with me, it invariably turns out that they weren’t directive in any way.

This is the messaging equivalent of ‘making a move,’ in the real-world and, like the real world, fortune favors the bold. Tell her what you want her to do; she can then decide if she wants to comply or not. (Hint: most of the time, she wants to comply.)

Reference her profile

If you’re looking for a serious or semi-serious relationship (or at least entertaining the possibility) it doesn’t hurt to demonstrate to her that you’ve read her profile.

Please, please, please, go beyond saying, “I also like X.” This is mediocre.

Instead, say something controversial, challenging, or noteworthy, like “I bet I can eat ice cream faster than you. Let’s find out.” Or “Marky Mark’s career is really overrated; I ran into him in the bathroom one time, and he agreed with me.” Or something even better.

Stand out & Keep it Short 

These last two are your bonus pro-tips. To stand out, try this tactic: create a female profile in your city, let the messages pour in for 24-48 hours, and then review the messages and take note of what every other guy in your city is doing to approach these women. Note what makes you annoyed, aggravated, or incredulous. Think of it as an exercise in “thinking like a woman” (not a bad habit to get into to build compassion, in fact.)

Then, plan your message strategy around being notably different from that.

For keep it short, I generally recommend your messages be no longer than 2-5 lines at the most. She isn’t trying to read a novel. You just need to convey humor, confidence, and demonstrate that you are a unique guy, and do it succinctly (remember: show, don’t tell.)

What awesome messages have you found that have worked really well? Share in the comments section below!

Get the eBook! Tips that maximize your time spent online dating for minimum effort. Just $7.99. Instant PDF download. Click the cover to buy

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