I consider myself a better-than-average looking guy. Let’s get that out of the way first.
So you can imagine, I was even more perplexed when I looked back over my history of using online dating, and realized that I usually found it a depressing slog.
I had never gotten very good results, and my standard reaction was to blame online dating itself: it was a terrible medium, it was set up wrong, there was no way to really test chemistry online, and only abnormal or mal-adjusted girls used it.
Now, maybe some of that is true, but maybe some of it isn’t. Maybe it’s a big case of sour grapes, and maybe I should take a closer look at what I was doing to get the results I said I wanted.
This year, I decided to really dig in, and figure out just exactly how to get good at online dating. I live in a rainy, cliquish town, so I found myself periodically returning to online dating even though I professed to hate it. What if I could make this work for myself, I thought? I mean, really work for myself, to the point that I never had to sit home alone on Friday or Saturday nights.
It was possible. Woah, it was possible. I now have dates every night of the week, if I so desire.
I had to share this knowledge with other guys. I started reading the Reddit /r/OkCupid and critiquing guys’ profiles, and man, there is a lot of ground to cover for most people.
So I started this blog, to share what I’d learned, and to help everyone get better at online dating.
Note: this site is mostly aimed at men, for now, although I’m embarking on a project to interview and reverse-engineers the profiles and approaches used by women who have gotten into satisfying long-term relationships or marriages through online dating (particularly OkCupid). If that’s you, let me know.